What are the things that we do every day that build trust? We have all heard it, “Say what you mean and mean what you say.” This may be the one thing that is more directly related to how much people trust us than any other thing we do.
I would suggest that there are two main ways that the things we say affect the amount of trust people have in us. The first, say what you mean. How often do we say something and the way it comes across is not really what we meant? Unfortunately, way too often. Our words are important and for some of us, we have the habit of blurting out the first thing that pops into our mind in a conversation.
The second is mean what you say. Alright, we said it, now we have two choices, stand behind it or correct it. If we really meant what we said, then there should be no problem representing ourselves in a way that lines up with what we said. If we did not mean it, then it’s time to come correct and say what we really meant.
When we say what we mean and mean what we say, we build trust because people have a reason to believe it. If you want credibility then say what you mean and mean it. Here are six ways that being consistent with your words helps to build trust:
1. CLARITY
Clarity is important anytime we communicate. When we are consistent in the words that we use and choose them carefully, we provide a clear representation of our thoughts and opinions. Others will know and understand what we are trying to say and there will be less likelihood for assumptions to be made. We all know what happens when we assume …
2. COMMUNICATION
Communication is the key to being successful at anything we do. When we put in the effort to communicate clearly, we say what we mean. Taking the time to formulate your thoughts is much easier when we let the other person finish their thoughts. Anyone else out there struggle with interrupting others before they are done speaking?
3. CONSISTENCY
There may be no better way to build trust then to be consistent with our words and actions. When others know what to expect and more importantly, know that they can believe it because we have a track record of behaving in a way that is consistent with what we say, we build trust.
4. CHARACTER
We all want to be thought of as a “person of character.” If we are not consistent with our words and actions, others may question our character. Saying what you mean and meaning what you say are two great ways to build character. Struggle with either of these and others may question your character.
5. RESPECT
We have all had someone tell us “You have my word on it” at one time or another. Did it mean anything to you? When your word does mean something, you will gain the respect of the people you are speaking to.
6. CREDIBILITY
We all want to be known as a credible person. We all know people that don’t say what they mean and very rarely mean what they say. How much credibility do you give to these people. More importantly, how much influence do these people have?
John Maxwell says that leadership is influence. Saying what we mean and meaning what we say allows us to build the trust that is needed to be able to influence others.
The next time you enter into a conversation, choose your words wisely. Make sure that you are saying what you really mean and more importantly, stand behind what you say. It may be the most important thing you do today.
A Minute With Maxwell … TRUST
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Barry Smith www.buildingwhatmatters.com 9/24/12 photo by author
