I recently read an article suggesting that character strengths can be developed by the environment in which kids grow up. I don’t think too many people would argue with this concept but what I found really interesting was that it was suggested that we can actually overcome environment with education.
Before you quit reading, thinking this is going to be a political statement, let me re-state one of my previous comments. I don’t like politics and I don’t make political statements. I am for the betterment of people and at the end of the day, I don’t think the government should be responsible for raising our kids.
Now that we have that out of the way, let me share with you what I think is a great perspective on breaking the cycle of under-achievement. There were four key words used about kids that were able to overcome their circumstances and succeed even though their environment (statistically speaking) would suggest otherwise.
1. GRIT
Grit to me is toughness. Middle class American kids today have it pretty easy and I think this is really hurting them. They will grow up (for sake of a better description) not really having had to deal with adversity and will struggle when challenged. Yes, I am making a broad generalization, but I have seen it over and over. In hindsight, I probably made it easier on my boys than I should of and hopefully there will not be a price to be paid later. Kids that grow up in a tough environment are going to be tougher. It’s just the way it is.
2. RESILIENCE
The ability to bounce back after a difficult situation is encountered is a character trait everyone needs. Unfortunately, some kids will never face “tough” times and will grow up with the attitude that things should be taken care of for them when challenging.
3. PERSEVERANCE
Perseverance in simple terms, is the act of pushing on even in difficult times. Then when you are about to give up, when you feel like your at your end. you push a little further.
4. OPTIMISM
If you grew up with not enough, optimism could possibly be represented by having just enough. If you grew up in an environment that always had more than enough, I believe the concept of optimism becomes skewed. I remember being optimistic about getting an HDTV because I was so dissatisfied with watching sports in standard definition – you remember, the picture that was just fine most of your life. Really?
I’ll admit, maybe I am a little overboard on this but here is my point. If you are reading this, life (globally speaking) is pretty good. But that same “more than enough” culture that we have grown up in has conditioned us to forget that life is supposed to be a challenge. Don’t tell me it’s a challenge to make your boat or motorhome payment every month. Overcoming adversity is what helps us grow.
The younger generation today is messed up and it’s our fault. I am not saying that our kids don’t deserve nice thing. We all want to be good providers. But make sure that your kids, or at least those in the next generation that you influence, understand what a struggle really is.
Education is education and while some people want to learn how to do it themselves, there is a whole other group that seems to just want to learn how to have others do it for them. Adversity may be the best educational tool we have. Unfortunately, this lesson is usually not learned from a book.
Be the exception to the rule and help someone break the cycle of entitlement and understand what it means to really struggle and then overcome the adversity they faced.
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Barry Smith www.buildingwhatmatters.com 10/27/12 photo by author
