Today I am travelling home to Oregon, but yesterday I was able to spend several hours walking along the Atlantic coastline in Florida with my wife Michelle. As I watched the tide continue to beat against an already battered shoreline (thanks to Tropical Storm Debby), I was reminded of the infinitely wise words of my grandmother who told me as a kid “never turn your back on the ocean, you have to respect it.”
Now the ocean has not really done anything to earn my respect. The power of the ocean, almost immeasurable, demands respect simply because of what it is. Somewhat of a “positional” respect. There is another kind of respect that I would like to say a few things about and that is the respect that is earned by the way in which we act and the way that we treat people.
John Maxwell in his The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership states that
“People naturally follow leaders stronger than themselves. This is The Law of Respect”
Consider who you are following. How have they earned your respect? Maybe the leader that came to mind for you has done nothing to earn your respect and simply has the assumed title of leader because of the position he holds. What thing do we need to do to earn the respect of others? Maxwell gives us six ways in which we can gain respect:
- Natural Leadership Ability – If you have natural leadership abilities, people will respect that and follow you.
- Respect For Others – When leaders show respect for others, it is easy for others to return the behaivior
- When people respect you as a person, they admire you
- When they respect you as a friend, they love you
- When they respect you as a leader, they follow you
- Courage – A leader’s courage has great value: it gives followers hope
- Success – A leaders success is important because people will follow to be part of it in the future
- Loyalty – When a leader remains loyal, even during difficult times, followers will respect them and their actions
- Value Added To Others – Possible the greatest source for respect is a leaders ability to add value to others
I have identified what I believe are the two types of respect:
- POSITIONAL – respecting a position for what it is
- PERSONAL – respecting the person for who they are
Have you ever felt disrespected by your superior? I am guessing we all have at one time or another. Mark Toth wrote The Top 10 Reasons Your Employees Really Quit in TLNT and referenced a survey of 20,ooo job quitters. Thirteen percent, second only to limited career opportunities, said they quit because they were not respected by their superiors.
You may be a leader because you advanced to that position through the ranks or you may be a leader because you earned your way up the ladder by your performance. Either way, you had better pay attention to how your actions convey respect to those above and below you. Without respect, a leader is nothing more than a manager.
Possibly the most important aspect regarding respect once you attain it is how to hold onto it. It may take years to build up the respect level expected of great leaders but it can take only one short event to wash it all away. Consider how you are respecting those around you and how you are being respected and try and identify the changes or improvements that need to be made.
The real question becomes “Have I earned the respect I am getting or is it simply because of the position I hold?
Click Here To See How Fast Respect Can Be Lost
Next Up: Law #8 – The Law Of Intuition
Barry Smith www.buildingwhatmatters.com 6/27/12
